2. I do have five older siblings, two more boys and three older girls. It's really kind of weird being the "baby" of one generation while the next one marches in -- oh yeah, I've a heckload of neices and nephews. We're like our own little army, really.

3. I grew up in the state most approximately central if you look at a map of the US. For this reason, we've been considered southern by the notherners, yanks by the southerners, Midwestern by east types -- well, and simply not the center of the universe, for the west coasters. Because of course, Cali is the center of the universe. Duh.

4. My family's background actually is southern. So most of my family does carry kind of a drawl -- maybe more of a twang? Whichever, it has been weened out of me by years of harassment and belittling.

5. When I say that my family's background is southern, I mean like Arkansas/Mississipi southern. And let me tell you, that's some deep southern. Thankfully, we'd migrated further north by the time I came along. I'm quite certain that if I'd been born into a farmlad area I would have crawled for the border at the earliest opportunity.

6. Everyone in my family but myself is an amazing cook. I seem to have the potential, but I never learned as everyone always cooked for me. But from all kinds of ethnic foods to baked stuff to gourmet -- if you want mouth-watering food, my family will have you covered. Shame I don't live in the same city anymore.

7. I now live in Minneapolis, MN. Uptown, to be precise. S'alright.

8. I've never gone through an entire winter in Minneapolis without at least once having my car towed due to a "snow emergency"... one city's diabolical plot to scam money from poor unexpecting out-of-towners.

9. I've a fairly deep voice and pretty precise enunciation, so I'd probably be good as a radio announcer or such. Not that I've ever tried, of course.

10. My whole life I've gotten comments on what a great smile I have. I suppose, for someone who's never had braces, my teeth are fairly straight. And fairly non-yellow, particularly considering I've smoked like a chimney.

11. I can't really swim, but I'm not afraid of water.

12. I've only ever won bell-bottoms when I was too young to have any idea at the sheer fashion horror of it.

13. I finished my first book at 13 and have written several others, without ever trying to be published. Do it for the love of it, kids.

14. Despite overall good diction and vocabulary, I still use the words "like", "dude", and "cool" way, way too.

15. I think ideology without conviction is silliness. Live what you preach.

16. Though I do not carry it with me, I still have a security blanket. It's very comfy.

17. I'm not really a stoner, I just play one on tv.

18. I have never paid for a haircut.

19. I cannot dance. Not at all. More's the pity.

20. I'm a packrat and a cleanliness freak. It's a good combo.

21. I didn't always have a compulsion towards obsessive cleaning, but once military deep-cleaning exposed to me how insidious dirt can be I found it kind of hard not to join the war against filth.

22. The only television shows I've watched in recent years are Buffy, Angel, and Smallville. Strangely though, I don't feel like I'm missing much.

23. I used to really want to be informed and aware and such news-wise, but please pardon the cynicism these days: I'll care enough to know when you can also tell me how knowing will allow me to make some difference. A bitter ex-idealist, me? No.

24. In movies, give me completely silly humor and/or pretty explosions and action sequences. If it's something that can really happen in life, it'll probably just bore me as much as most life does.

25. I've actually always looked forward to becoming an old man, because I've thought my temperment, perspective, opinions and overall disposition have all traditionally been more fitting for a curmudgeon than anyone young.

26. Like all of my immediate family, I am a complete night owl.

27. I no longer believe in money, which is okay seeing as money no longer believes in me.

28. My first broken bone came in the summer of '03, after a 30 year streak of being quite lucky in such matters.

29. As of July '04, one ankle is still somewhat weaker than the other, and still sometimes aches of its own accord.

30. I served in the military for four years. It sucked. If you're a US citizen, you're welcome. If you're not -- um, sorry for my "superiors"?

31. I'm very rarely on time for anything, from professional to personal engagements. I think it might be because I consider time an illusion. That, or I just procrastinate a lot.

32. I'm currently in school to get a psychology degree, with an eventual plan to be a therapist. I will behave much more normally as a therapist than has been described here.

33. I'm also working part time as a bouncer, tho I've yet to actually have "bounced" anyone. Mostly I walk around and say, "Don't do that" quite a bit.

34. No tattoos or piercings of any kind. But I do have several pretty scars.

35. I actually do have an evil twin brother, from whom I was separated at birth. He, apparently, is both a genius and completely insane. Besides that tho, we're really pretty hard to tell apart.

36. My evil twin and I are very rarely seen in the same place at the same time, thus many people actually doubt that he exists. Oh, but he does.

37. I love video games to distraction. A game that tests your ability to strategize or reason can easily keep me hooked for months.

38. If I had my druthers, I'd rather wash the dishes after than cook the meal in the first place. Which works out well with most cooks I've met.

39. I'm either rather quiet and reserved or positively impossible to shut up. Reports vary on which is preferable.

40. I firmly believe that my best work is done at the last possible instant. Or maybe even slightly after that.

41. I have occassionally been mistaken for gay since more or less puberty, before which I would get mistaken for a girl. I guess I'm just way in touch with my feminine side. Whatever that means.

42. I smoke like a chimney and curse like a sailor. And I'm fond of making analogies.

43. I'm pretty spiritual yet I've no traditional belief system upon which to hang my hat. Suffice to say, "there is a universal justice, and the eyes of truth are always watching you."

44. I'm really none to aggressive, preferring instead to find a more civilized solution to disputes. My twin brother, on the other hand, would just as soon sucker punch you as say hello.

45. I can read minds and tell the future. Sadly, no one ever believes me on this. More's the pity, folks. More's the pity.

46. My whole life, my closest friends have tended to be society's freaks. What the deal with that? I'd say "birds of a feather", but honestly I'm just downright charming. For reals.

47. Ever since the military, I've tended to sport a shaved head. Which is just as well, for I fully expect to start balding any second now.

48. I am absolutely gorgeous. But strangely, not conceited about it at all.

49. I grew up on comic books, and am still without a doubt greatly influenced by those larger-than-life stories. Speaking of which, was Spider-man 2 not the bomb?

50. One day I will save the world. Because someone has to do it.

51. It's not that I'm insane, just that I find reality can often be quite tedious.

52. I think that porn, done correctly, is really quite a Good Thing.

53. I take really, really long showers. Which has absolutely nothing to do with the preceding detail.

54. I also eat very slowly.

55. I do not like amusement park rides.

56. I sleep quite a lot. One of my favorite hobbies, really.

57. I once stayed awake for four days straight, by sheer will alone. I discovered it's not really that much fun.

58. I still like cartoons.

59. Most of my music doesn't get much radio airplay. Guess that means I might have taste.

60. I was really kind of a small kid, but as of adolescence I really couldn't ever pass for a lady at all. Well, maybe a really unattractive one.

61. I love chocolate-flavored things.

62. I've actually had a pretty serious sweet tooth my whole life, which is why maybe only 60% of my teeth today are actually my teeth.

63. I have worn a summer dress out in public. I found I don't really care for dresses.

64. I also don't care for makeup. For these reasons and more, I don't imagine I'd make a very good drag queen. Yep. More's the pity.

65. Besides sweets, I'm a freak for cheese. All kinds of cheese, even the weird kind that comes in an aerosol can.

66. I once burst into uncontrollable laughter in the middle of sex, due to suddenly remembering a certain Monty Python bit. She didn't take it personally.

67. I did not smoke, drink, or have sex until after high school. Which, really, only made me feel like I had to make up for lost time.

68. I am a cat person.

69. At not quite 5'9", I'm a genetic anamoly amongst my family, where the shortest men otherwise are 6'1" or so.

70. While shorter, I do share the sheer body mass that runs in my family. If I did not, I might seriously wonder if I were the milkman's kid.

71. I generally don't kill bugs, unless they are particularly bothering me. Excepting, of course, for roaches. And fleas. And misquitoes. These things I find simply disgusting and evil, and thus think it my duty to do what I can to annihilate them.

72. I own a television, but have not had any reception to speak of in maybe three years. Honestly, that's probably a good thing, as in the past I could watch absolute crap rather than do anything productive or stimulating.

73. I was considered a hippie in the military, and have been called a right-wing stooge by some lefties after I got out. Luckily, I tend to think labels belittle the labeler more than the labelee.

74. My very first job was pizza delivery. Thus I know that it's actually quite scary, how much of people's lives you can get an unwanted glimpse at while simply waiting for payment and a tip.

75. I've also been a waiter, so I know that every big tip is generally offset by the bastards who typically stiff servers. So dig deep, you stingy bastards. Give till it hurts.

76. I cannot fall asleep while driving, regardless of my exhaustion level. I am glad of this life-preserving instinct.

77. Tho I don't actually fear them, I don't really enjoy flying in planes. Odds aside, I'd rather take my chances with me at the wheel than anyone else. Um. And stay on solid ground.

78. I cannot possibly sleep well in unfamiliar settings. Probably because even exhaustion cannot override my basic suspicion that the world is out to get me.

79. I fly all the time in my dreams. It's fun, but disappointing to wake up and remember that you can't really do that.

80. I cannot control my dreams, but I can will myself to wake up if I don't like what's going on.

81. They say money can't buy happiness, but I suspect that's just something they tell poor people.

82. "All my life been po', but it really don't matter no mo'..." That's what I said, kids.

83. I've a best friend of 16 years that I've recently come to suspect is actually in love with me. Yeah, it's a little complicated.

84. Like any good tragic hero, any woman I fall for is inevitably destined to be evil. If Catwoman was a nurse or something, Batman would have settled down and given up the crimefighting years ago.

85. For any comics fan who might wish to correct me: 1) I know Catwoman isn't actually evil, just "bad". 2) Wow, lighten up, wouldja? It's just comics. Really.

86. I consider myself a socialist, which means in the US political spectrum I do not exist.

87. I only like eggs if they're scrambled.

88. I punched a wall and broke my hand in early '04. Really not the brightest thing I've ever done.

89. I think pot is a far better (and better for you) drug than booze. If you don't think so -- well, you're just wrong. Life's like that, tho.

90. I will never own a house unless I can get someone else to mow the lawn. Some things you just don't cotton to.

91. I am convinced I could win a one-on-one fight with a bear, if I were properly motivated and prepared. Sure, they got the claws and the strength and the teeth ... but I'm a goddamn genius, baby!

92. I believe worldwide utopia could be reached if only everyone listened to me. Um. And if my evil twin wasn't still out there being all evil.

93. I'm really not into cars. If it gets me where I'm going in relative comfort, good enough.

94. I've actually never stolen anything in my life -- not even towels from a hotel. Probably because I collect enough random crap as it is.

95. I have cut a woman's hair for her before, but I did a shitty job. I guess we can't all be stylists.

96. I actually liked the Charlie's Angels movies. And the first Scooby Doo one, tho I missed the sequel. We all have skeletons.

97. I've never owned more than three pairs of shoes at any given time.

98. I can't sing, but I do anyway.

99. I'm prone to trying to get people to arm wrestle me. Yes, even women.

100. My highly-evolved attitude towards unwelcome criticism goes something like this: I'm rubber and you're glue...