Blast from the past: Once when I was a wee young lad, a sibling and I somehow came across a condom and, not knowing what else to make of it, inevitably blew it up to end up with a lame but very curious sort of balloon. Some years later, I believe I saw a similar circumstance used for humor in a sitcom. (I think it was a sitcom.) In the show/movie it probably wasn't very funny, but that it happened in real life kinda is.

Also, basically random: Tonight an older lady, fiftyish or so, turned and came back up a flight of stairs as her party was leaving and, tho I hadn't actually spoken or otherwise interacted with her all night, tipped me five bucks because, "You smiled at me every time I went by." That kinda made my night. I hadn't even particularly noticed smiling at her, so it just goes to show, sometimes being a good egg actually has rewards.

I also had a couple girls come on to me pretty strong, if in a typical girl fashion. By typical fashion, I mean that showing obvious interest seems to be pretty much the height of allowed sexual initiative for most women. With a complete stranger, that is. And, if she's sober. And she was sober, and I was a stranger. She seemed a sweet girl, sadly my focus of attention couldn't be completely switched over fast enough to actually do my part and respond when she keeps saying how I'm cute and such. (By the by, I'm actually not cute, more like handsome, but you don't argue specifics on these things, right?) So yeah, if you are a girl and you've ever found yourself being really clear about your attraction to some guy who seemed oblivious -- y'know, sometimes he might just have been. I mean, not so much to that you like him, if you're specifically telling him so ... but, oblivious as to what they're supposed to do about it.

Yeah yeah, you'd think that part would seem pretty goddamn simple, right? And you'd be right. But just because it's simple doesn't mean it'll occur to you at the time. Haven't we all sometime found ourselves suddenly helpless to recall something we know we know? You know, our own phone number, the name of our favorite teacher from high school, whatever. Point is, in the past I've locked my keys in my running car, and I've said goodnight and walked away from a gorgeous woman who asked me to sleep with her. I argue that my brain was having the same sort of malfunction in each case. I know I'd generally turn the car off and remove the keys before locking the car doors, but my brain just couldn't switch to that fast enough from the conversation that distracted me in the first place. Likewise, responding to a request for sex by jumping the person usually seems a pretty efficient strategy. Um. But I was tired, and was mentally already into the steps of heading for the bed.

Okay, fine. Maybe I'm just an idiot. Sometimes.

Oh, topically -- I'm typing this entry on my desktop first, and will utilize the scant 2-5 minutes I'm allowed online to actually post when I can. You see, the process of getting online for me now takes about ten minutes, and sometimes the instant I'm connected I'm bounced off again, and I have to go through the whole process again. Oh, a lot of it is just waiting, so I do other stuff at the same time, but still. Plus, as I say, if I get an actual 10-15 minute block of time online, I feel like singing a hymn in the name of the Internet Gods. Mostly, I spend easily more than twice the time getting online as I actually get to be online. If that sentence is grammatically correct and comprehensible. Um. And I know that fragment I just wrote wasn't a whole sentence, but I'm okay with that.

Where was I?

Oh yeah. Screw this, I'm gonna have to get DSL again.

Hm. Right, and I'd wanted to say: I was saying how I'm not as strong as I used to be? Well maybe not, but I'm actually still a pretty damn strong sonofabitch, it turns out. A few weeks back in the gym, and actually I'm working out pretty much as hard as I usually did. Well, harder than I often did, honestly, because I'm working uphill at this point.

The problem is, and has been, that from a genetic standpoint I'm more or less intended to be built really like a human tank, if you can picture that. Big, tough, but none too quick moving. Able to attack powerfully, yes. Quickly, not so much. Anyway, not that I'm particularly saying I was built to fight specifically, just that I think strength and power come easy for me. Speed doesn't. Flexibility sure as hell doesn't. And unfortunately, being able to exibit this tremendous strength consistently and reliably for prolonged periods doesn't. And that's where the sweatin' comes in.

Speaking of which, happy to report I'm really barely even beading up, even when working really hard. Dammit, I knew I hadn't always been one hellaciously sweaty bastard, I just couldn't put my finger on when it started for the longest time. Bah. Goddamn psycho-meds.

But yeah, I can lift some heavy stuff, the workout comes from just going rep afer rep, set after set, and so on. I'm actually pushing pretty hard, because I'm starting to remember that there is this strangely pleasing chemical thing your brain does at some point after enough exertion. That's when it gets really fun, sadly I don't think I'm quite there yet. Ah, but I know that it's coming.

And what else is coming? Flat, rock hard abs to accompany the more slimmed and toned physique I will have within a couple of months. Which, finally, is my actual point in this entry.

You know, it's certainly a Good Thing if you look good in clothes. But honestly? I just don't think that most people look that great naked. I mean, most humans just don't. Mostly, we tend to look pretty utilitarian.

But, asthetics do apply sometimes, and dang it, really -- some people really do just look good naked. I mean, you know, mostly they're models and such. But whoever and however -- yeah, I'd say looking good naked's a definite Plus as well. Though, really -- I suppose if it came down to it, feeling good naked is probably whole lot more important, hm? If what looks good and what feels good must be exclusive, I suppose we'd really have to put feeling good as priority, yeah? Unless of course, we're more concered with others wanting us than we are with whatever transpires with whomever we're actually with.

You know, just if anyone wanted my opinion or anything?