If you haven't yet, be sure to get out there and get your freak on, because it's All Hallow's Eve, and that's what it's there for.

But, somehow I'm thinking I won't be getting my own groove on tonight. For one, I still am feeling pretty sick. Two, still kinda timid about the use of the ankle, though by and large it now seems more sore and weak than actually broken...

Don't know that I would necessarily let all that stop me, but as it happens none of the options immediately available seem to appeal to me.

The main option would be that that new juggarnaut alliance of friends I created by introducing A. to C. and B. (Funny how they're the beginning of the alphabet.) Because now, overwhelming any individual invitations, they will gang up and say "We're all here/going here, and we all want to see you". Of course, the insinuation being, we know you only have so many friends, and when we can get a guaranteed 80-90% of us in one place -- what else might you have going on, besides a desire to diss us?

Because those guys are all going to a party tonight. Which is groovy, except when we consider the current state of my relationships with those included.

Now, my friend B. is always cool. Well, not always, but she's no problem now. Except, possibly, for a tendency she has when she's drunk, which is to kind of just agree with people or tell them what they want to hear. This is no actual problem between us though, I just think it might help to contribute to others.

Perhaps with A., for instance. Since I haven't seen her since I "broke up" with her, I was slightly uncomfortable when I joined the whole group last night, and within 30 minutes everyone else had left but her. Particularly because the conversation in that 30 minutes made it clear that at least some of the previous conversation had been about me. So long and short of it is that she "makes a pass" as it were -- or more accurately, acts as if it's expected that we're going home together -- and ended up seeming quite angry indeed when I said I really did only want to go home by myself, and go to bed by myself.

And there's C., and while we love her to death, we just can't shake the awareness that where she goes drama tends to follow. And since she was apparently quite jealous when she'd thought A. and I were a couple ... and has since said that she thinks I should be with her -- yeah, she can really be a lot of fun, but she can also be a huge pain in the ass when you get the feeling that she's trying to manipulate people to get what she wants.

I mean, do that if you're going to. But don't be obvious about it, and don't be heartless and selfish about it.

Along with those three, also along for this night would be the couple S. and A2. Lessee, S. is a friend who happens to think I'm an immoral "playa" predator-type guy, and thus in some senses only endures my presence because I'm friends with all his friends. But he actually does like me in some ways, he respects the way I think, but unfortunately because I'm older and typically a better debater, I think he lapses from enjoying my company into resentment or insecurity. So though I've never had a younger brother, I almost imagine going to a party with him would be something like that.

And his girl A2? Really not even going to say much about her, except that she's this incredibly hyper personality who makes C. seem laid-back and carefree by comparison. She is not as much a drama queen, but she is very opinionated and very assertive. She's also 12 years older than the guy she's with, and I think just a bit protective of him. So yeah, throw her into the party, why not.

Then there is my friend H. Ah, H. She was there the first night I introduced all these guys to A., but she was so wasted they had to carry her home. She was quite embarrassed about that, because she really does not drink much or often. I haven't seen her since, tho she has constantly hounded me because I'd picked up her tab for that night.

Sweet girl, I just don't get her. For one, honestly, she's quite boring. She isn't particularly over-interested in anyone else's stories or ideas, nor does she seem to consider worthwhile to talk about much of her own life -- except, of course, for her various failings, miseries, and fears. And then there's this oddly suspicious nature she has when I say we should do something -- like, as if, if it wasn't her idea, maybe it's me being "up to something". What the hell would I be up to?

And that obsessive need to balance out after every time out. Jesus Christ, I'll get this time, you get me next time. Or some other time. Or not. Whatever. Listen, it was two weeks ago, can we talk about something else?

But most baffling about H. -- I actually am meant to be "courting" her. I mean, I'm not. For one thing, we've known each other years without any particular sparks there. For another, we've actually talked about it before, and clearly it would seem that we are incompatible as a couple.

For instance, she seems finally convinced, after having had two lovers, and two lovers leave her, that a woman should not give in to sex until she has been committed to -- maybe an engagement ring and date set, at the least, if not until after actual marriage.

Now, note that I say "give in to", there... that is not, according to her, a "give in to your desires", but a "give in to your man." Because apparently women just aren't supposed to enjoy sex, and she really just doesn't think about it much. A good wife should put out for her husband as much as necessary to keep him happy, but she's not supposed to enjoy it.

Oh, and she wants to submit to the will of her guy, because that's the way it's supposed to be. Like, she doesn't have to make decisions or worry about anything or necessarily even know anything, because "taking care of us" would ultimately be his job. Taking care of him is her job.

So yeah, you wonder why I'm writing this at this hour on Halloween, instead of already out in a costume and partying? Well, cause to do that this year, I'd have to diss a good chunk of my friends, in favor of a bunch of strangers whose company I might actually enjoy.