Anyhow, GBF had gotten hold of me sometime Monday, and is continuing the brilliant plan of just trying to pretend I never told him I think he's gay. So, he was wanting to hang out, and I pretty much told him, "Eh, good luck with that." Don't get me wrong, we could hang -- but you know, if I tell you there's something big and scary knocking on your front door, really I'm not likely to sit and have tea with you while you pretend it's not there. You know, at least tell me the big scary thing is actually a friend of yours. Don't just frickin ignore it. Feel me?

So, I'm still sleeping/lounging around today when she calls. You know, the girl I'd been so head over heals for, who I'd written last Friday to try and get some concept of exactly what was going on with us? Now help me out with this one, ladies -- she wanted to know if I was upset with her, if she'd somehow offended me or something, because I hadn't called over the whole weekend and she knew when my off days are. Oh, and she was out of town staying with friends for the weekend.

How can you wonder why I didn't call you if you weren't even there? *insert random confused-sounding noise here*

So, because I'm sick and haven't been out, she offers to bring me some soup or something, and since I'm actually feeling somewhat better I suggest we actually go out for food.

So we hang out, and it's fun. (Oh, the reason for the preface detail about GBF -- he called while she and I were arranging to get together, ostensibly to find out if he and I are going to get together. I just told him I was talking to someone else. Such callousness I might usually feel somewhat bad about, but -- yeah, reference the not-ignoring-what-I've-said principle I talked about above.) So anyway, I won't go into all the details of our night, you know -- a few glasses of wine, good conversation, we actually ended up seeing some live music.

Like I say, we have fun. But. At the end of the night, she rushes home with barely a parting kiss to say goodnight. Okay, granted, we're each on the road to recovery from two apparently different viruses. Whatever, since when is that realistically gonna stop you from getting close to the one you lust for?

No no, it wasn't about the being sick. Rather, as far as I can tell, it's a continuation of this "taking it slow" business. Le sigh, kids. Seriously. Fucking le sigh.

Okay, I'll be eternally greatful if some kind person could explain this to me. So -- you can make out with whomever you want, you can even have one night stands or other sorts of short term flings if it tickles your fancy. In fact, when we initially met (again) we dived headfirst into the making out/petting our way to sex way of doing things. But okay -- then you decide you really like me. And this is where we get confused.

So, even though ... well, realistically, we've pretty much been there already ... you're telling me that, because you'd hope to have an actual relationship with me, you musn't even make out with me just yet. (Okay, a point to grant: It's actually pretty hard to work backwards from such things. That is, the idea that we would make out and not end up naked together is somewhat unlikely because that's where it took us before. But hey -- I'm willing to give it a shot.)

You see, for me it just doesn't make sense. Why would you be more conservative with the guy you really want? I mean -- especially when you weren't even that conservative with him, at first.

Does this all make sense to any of you? Is this a difference of understanding created by the differences between men and women? Or is she just kinda insane?

I hate to say it, but I almost hope she's just doing a horribly botched job of trying to show she's no longer interested. I say horribly botched, because I know a pretty easy way to show such a thing: How bout just telling me? Anyway, I'd almost prefer that because, at this stage in my life, I'm really feeling none too welcoming towards things that confuse me. There's always enough of that to go around anyways, I don't need people just adding to it whenever they get the urge.

If not interested, Confusing Girl, you could really just say so. I mean, my ego will insist that the evolved lack of interest has more to do with your screwed up life experience than with me, but besides that it would really be no skin off my nose. Well, I'll admit, liking her as much as I do, I don't actually have too much desire to end up a platonic friend, but -- you know, you can't always get what you want. So if it doesn't work out, you know, it just doesn't.

On the other hand? If you really are quite interested, and this "slow" crap really is some elaborate mating dance you've pulled me into? Well, congratulations. Fond though I may be of you overall, you're now also a woman I'll be thinking of when I exclaim (as most guys inevitably will at some point) that women are crazy.

I'll tell you one thing -- I'd think it really pretty odd if, just switching the sexes in such a relationship, a guy imposed this sort of "slow" scenario on a girl he was interested in. Not saying it absolutely couldn't happen, mind you ... just that, if it did, his friends would call him crazy, too.