Eh, but I'm not about some negativity right this particular moment. I mean, I could be, but really what would be the point?

Nah, instead I wanted to share with ya'll some of the things I've been learning by playing an online RPG for several hours a day, at least. Now, if you haven't drowned yourself in this pasttime as I have, you might think that there's nothing I could possibly share that could have any relevance or meaning for you -- but thinking so would be a mistake, and I will tell you why.

Online games are not simply about the pretty polygons sparkling away on the screen in front of you. Oh, no. They're not just about leveling up, getting the coolest armor or gear, or having the game skill to completely "pwn" your competitor. (Quotes supplied for the uninitiated, btw.) The aspect of the online game that makes it so much more addictive than its offline counterpart is that it actually is human interaction.

Now I'll grant you, it's a pretty strange sort of interaction. I mean, for one thing, what you see in an RPG definitely isn't what you actually get -- that's part of the point, really. In real life, you are just what you are, and you only have so much of a say in that. In RPG, you are (or at least appear as) whatever you wish. Be freaky-looking, be beautiful. Be large or small. Be young, old, be an alien if you want. It's all up for grabs.

One of the most central choices, of course, is that you don't have to play the sex that you are. Even funnier, you don't have to tell people if you're playing a different sex than you really are. As a side note here, this is why I would never, ever cyber in an RPG ... and yeah, I have been asked.

Actually, I'm kidding there -- I'd never do cybersex in the first place, because I tried it once and it's just kinda pointless to me. But that's just me. Anyways...

I will say that it's interesting to see the different ways that your appearance can affect your interaction within the game ... for instance, I have an in-game friend who is apparently a 43 year old woman, but the character she usually plays when I interact with her is a child. I don't think it was her intent, but a side-effect of this that I've noticed is that people are more protective of her. I mean, it's funny because I'm sure if people think about it they know she's not really a kid ... maybe just that some of the roleplaying comes naturally, I guess.

Along the same lines, it will always be in your in-game social interests to play a character who's an attractive female -- for the obvious (if slightly sad) reason that a great many gamers are lonely nerds who couldn't get a real girl to look at them unless they were on fire. So one road to in-game success, if you don't actually have much gaming skill, is to play as a cute girl and just flirt with every guy ... it won't work with everyone, but I do imagine it would work enough to get you pretty far. In fact, I know it would. And if you're wondering: My highest in-game character (lvl 41 now out of a possible 50! woot!) actually does look like me. Well, as much as the gaming graphics allow. Okay, okay, I'll admit -- he's actually taller. What the hell, I always wanted to be taller.

Anyhow, I'm off the point I meant to get to, which is this: Among all this unusual interaction, you actually can learn things that are applicable to real life. At least, I can. So I thought I'd share with you a couple of the things I learned.

Here's something I picked up during a discussion about the different character types you can play ... more specifically, my main character is of the type that is most difficult to play, as it trades toughness for a greater range of abilities, and thus allows for easy death if you can't handle those abilities effecively. A bunch of people who play these types of characters are talking, and basically complaining because they feel unappreciated on teams. And the complaint is valid enough -- a lot of people who play easier character types don't really know all what these types' powers do anyway, and even if they do often they don't see us doing anything ... basically, if we're doing our jobs well things go really smoothly, and if we're not people start dying left and right. So blame comes easy, appreciation rarely, and that's what people are bitching about.

And someone comes out with this: "You shouldn't need recognition to do your job. A hero does not need thanks to do right."

A hero does not need thanks to do right!

I love that. Clearly, it speaks to a lot of what I've been brooding on in the past months. I've been feeling at odds, in real life, because I've felt like I've strived for high ideals pretty consistently, as if I've tried to be honest and kind and courageous and just -- in short, like I've been trying to be a hero -- and yet, not only does it not usually pay off, not only does it not seem I don't get much credit even when it does, but it can even seem to earn the resentment or scorn of people either way. So, it's been troubling.

But you know what? A hero does not need thanks to do right. It's true.

The other bit was about leadership, which is also a topic that's something of an issue for me. This one came as I'd been teaming through several missions with some people, and at some point during a pretty difficult one most of the team leaves. As tends to happen frequently in such cases, I end up the default leader. I don't know if this is due to my character type, which as I said is one of the harder ones, or if it's my play style. Either way, I don't necessarily like being made lead because one responsibility of leader is to replace the teammates who ditch when it's tough. I did okay with it this time, including getting a who is amongst my list of friends. We go back and kick that mission's butt, and move on to more.

The guy from my friends list also happens to have a character that's part of the group I team with regularly. So as I know he's a much more experienced gamer than myself, I let him take charge, and again we do well. A mission or two later, after some others have dropped and he's replaced them, he asks if I want to lead. I respond by saying no, this is my highest level character.

He says, "So what? Being a good leader doesn't require that you know everything, just that you know what you want to do. If you know, you tell people what to do. Some will listen, some won't. That's life."

Okay, not quite as succinct as the first bit. Still, I love the simple truth here: Being a leader doesn't require knowing everything, it only requires knowing what you want to do.

I mean, I never thought of it that way, but is it not true? There's never any guarantee that you will succeed even with a competent leader, and I think it's wanting that guarantee that's made me tend to shy away from leading. In short, I didn't want people to follow me if doing so would mean they followed me into failure. But again: competent leadership is never a guarantee of success anyway, is it? I know for myself, I've followed people I knew were competent, and therefore did not resent them even if things didn't work out.

And when it comes right down to it, what is it that we look for most, as far as a leader goes? A good leader doesn't have to know everything his/her followers know, and then some. That's silly and unrealistic. If that's what a leader was, it would make followers essentially redundant. No, for a good team everyone ideally should bring some unique aspects, which by definition means they will have strengths the leader doesn't.

So one key aspect to a competent leader is recognizing the strengths and talents of team members, and playing to the strengths. Another is helping the team to work together, as this also plays towards the individual strengths. But really, the most key aspect is that which will allow for why something is a needed strength or not: What is it, exactly, that we are trying to accomplish here?

Now it's funny, because I can be pretty decisive when the action's happening. I'm good at recognizing what people are good at, and playing to those things. I'm also good at getting people to work together. I'm talking both in-game and in real life here, by the way. Something I falter at in real life however, even if not so much in the game? I don't always know exactly what it is that I want to do.

The best, most consistent reason I've ever found for doing anything is what Ani said: for the joy it brings.

I dunno, tho. Mayhap that I need to find a few other reasons?