Bah, I'm sure in some sort of way I've brought this on myself. I've no idea how exactly, but generally speaking when things are kinda f'd up, in some twisted and improbable ways it probably really is my fault.

For instance, I cut my hair this past weekend -- and the temperature dropped. So sure, we could argue that I didn't know that it was going to get colder ... but really, it is that time of year, and we are in Minnesota, and if a wooly head of hair ain't gonna keep you warm then you should have some kind of idea exactly what will.

So bad, bad me. When I finally grab medication that can dry up my eternally-draining sinuses, I will do so with full knowledge that I am escaping I fate I deserved all too well. And might I never dare again to tread so carelessly where I know not of circumstances nor consequences.

So, in other news... well, healing in one way while a bit worse in another, we could say. Last night learned to, for the most part, get around on a single crutch. This is quite an accomplishment, because doing this well actually does require two functioning legs.

While my ankle isn't totally healed, and I wouldn't try to walk on it withouth the cast, I think I have figured out how to put weight on it in a general way that neither asks too much nor produces any twist -- actually, the mental concept I had that seemed to be my breakthrough seems to have been to kind of consider my left leg as a replacement for my left crutch.

You know, because I've been moving as a tripod for like six weeks. That two-points-down-one-point-up technique, with the slight modification that the left point can mostly only be used as a balance point -- or rather, not used to carry much more than its own weight --well, I'd say give me a day or two of practice at this, and I'll be hopping around like a ballerina. With one crutch.

Of course, around then or shortly after would be when I'm supposed to get rid of supports all together, and stride into the world on simple two that god gave me.

Yes, yes. It is all very exciting.

But check this out -- I'm meeting today with the woman who ispired my "Can We Call That Love?" entry. Yesterday morning ... (okay, early afternoon) ... I was sleeping, and awoke to a phone call from her. She was saying it's a shame I don't have a day off, and I pointed out that I'm presently unemployed -- all my days are off, so to speak.

So she said let's get together today. And I said sure. Now, that might seem a strange thing -- but honestly, in all this time (year or so?), not once has time ever been even remotely described as available for us to spend together.

And really, at one point that was kind of a bothersome thing for me. But, hey, "Let's do lunch."

"Okay."

What can I say? I'm an easy-going guy.

But then again, while I am explaining that I will see my ex, allow me to clarify that by "see" we mean ... well, see. Duh. What else should it mean?

Anybody out there remember a little group called Bell Biv Devoe? Anyone recall a little song of theirs, "Poison"?

Nah, me neither. But if I did, I have a pretty good feeling that the reference would be perfectly appropriate.

Yet at the same time -- honestly, I just don't imagine seeing her without ... well, maybe freaking her just a little. After all this time, after all...

Is that just the way it tends to be with old lover's, though? You remember the thrill and the suspense, the excitement of the first time you two conquered one another -- you want to feel again the rapture of daring to actually touch, to openly want ... to obviously enjoy...

I don't know if that's making sense, but consider this: How powerful a moment of release, to finally allow yourself to ravage some fantastic specimen of god's embodied art, to be allowed to smell, taste, touch, feel -- not just someone or something, but the someone.

You know like, that person from whom the first moment you briefly met eyes, if not for society's rules you would have immediately run to be devoured and lost in ... to kiss them, to hug them, to experience them in every way possible.

Most of the time, we only only allow ourselves the most fleeting of those impulses, to allow our minds to wander in that direction only briefly. And with an old lover -- you already know the joy of your both finally given in to your bodies calling for one another.

Have you ever had a lover whose body just fit so perfectly well with yours, that you realized a match this well made could not be coincidental -- someone about whom you finally, literally, and defintely knew: We were made for each other.

While that initial overwhelming ecstasy may fade a bit over time, if you're allowed to ravish one another as often as daily circumstances permit ... even after all that, give it enough time and that longing will increase again back to its original vigor. Particularly because this time, you both already know exactly how amazing your bodies are together.

Well. So why am I getting together with her anyway, you may be wondering?

Believe it or not, business concerns. Well, some sentimental, too -- she's a person I was once quite fond of, I imagine I'd still rather enjoy her company. And in fact, it's because of that that I think I'll take this opportunity to propose to her a possible business venture that would be benefical for us both.

You see, you Do No Sex Your Ex ... you go into business with them.